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[RC] Warmer Weather--Very Long - Ridecamp GuestPlease Reply to: Bruce Weary bweary@xxxxxxxxxxxx or ridecamp@xxxxxxxxxxxxx ========================================== Time to change the atmosphere a bit. My best to Bev and Paladin, and for those of you wishing for warmer weather, consider the following diary I recently came across. Be careful what you wish for......... Dear Diary, May 30th: Just moved to Mesa, Arizona. Now this is a city that knows how to live! Beautiful, sunny days and warm balmy evenings. Mountains and deserts blend together. What a place! Watched the sunset from a park, lying on a blanket. It was beautiful. I've finally found a home. I love it here. June 14th: Really heating up. Got to 100 degrees today. Not a problem. Live in an air conditioned home and drive an air conditioned car. What a pleasure to see the sun every day like this. I'm turning into a real sun-worshipper. June 30th: Had the back yard landscaped with western plants today. Lots of cactus and rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing for me. Another scorcher, but I love it here. July 10th:The temperature hasn't been below 100 all week. How do people get used to this kind of weather? At least it's nice and windy though, but getting used to it is taking longer than I expected. July 15th: Fell asleep by the pool.Got third degree burns over sixty percent of my body. Missed two days of work. What a dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson, though. Got to respect the ol' sun in a climate like this. July 20th: I missed Morgan (our cat) sneaking into the car when I left for work this morning. By the tiime I got out to the car for lunch, Morgan had swollen to the size of a shopping bag and exploded all over two thousand dollars of leather upholstery. I told the kids she ran away. The car now smells like kibbles and sh**. No more pets in this heat. July 25th: This wind sucks. It feels like a giant freakin' blow- dryer! The home air conditioner is on the fritz and the A/C repairman charged $200 just to drive by and tell me he needed to order parts. July 30th: Been sleeping outside by the pool for three nights now. Fifteen hundred dollars in damn house payments and we can't even go inside. Why did I ever come here? August 4th: It's 113 degrees. Finally got the A/C fixed. It cost $500 and only gets the temperature down to about 90 degrees. Stupid repairman peed in my pool. I hate this stupid city. August 8th: If another wise-ass says "Hot enough for you today?" I'm going to tear his throat out. Damn the heat. By the time I get to work, the radiator is boiling over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I smell like roasted freakin' Garfield. August 9th: Tried to run some errands after work. Wore shorts and sat on the black leather seating in the ol' car. I thought my ass was on fire. I lost two layers of flesh. Now my car smells like burnt ass and fried cat. August 10th: The weather report might as well be a damn recording: hot and sunny. It's been too hot to do sh** for two months, and the weatherman says it might really warm up next week. August 14th: Welcome to Hell! the temperature got up to 115 degrees today. Forgot to crack the window and blew the windshield out of the Lincoln. The installer came to fix it and said "Hot enough for you today?" My wife had to spend the $1500 house payment to bail me out of jail. I'm just the messenger, folks. Bruce Weary =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Ridecamp is a service of Endurance Net, http://www.endurance.net. Information, Policy, Disclaimer: http://www.endurance.net/Ridecamp Subscribe/Unsubscribe http://www.endurance.net/ridecamp/logon.asp Ride Long and Ride Safe!! =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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