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Re: [RC] Horses and Husbands - CharlesI've read all the answers and I thought I'd add what worked for me. First everyone else has it right. The compliments, the need, the technical problems, etc. all were part of it. In my case I don't think it was planned, it just worked out this way. It started before we married. I had never owned a horse, and my riding experience was and still is, pretty non-existent. I'd gone with my wife to several feedings and so I didn't feel uncomfortable, but I wasn't comfortable either. I ended up grooming and feeding her horses while she was crewing at the Kentucky Rolex ***. I spent a week going out each day bringing the horses in, feeding them their premixed meals, and currying hair off a horse that was fuzzier than anything I'd ever seen. I found the horses patient and nice. After a while I noticed that people were having fun riding, and I wanted to try it myself. Unfortunately, I'm pretty heavy, and most people look at me, look at their horse and say "I'd rather you didn't ride my horse". I ended up buying "Finders Keepers" a 17.2 Percheron Mare. I posted a picture of her in the photo album. I still feel sad when I ride another horse. It didn't hurt that Susan found me especially attractive (though not till after a shower) after we got home from the barn. Somehow we've ended up with 6 horses. She goes around telling folks "there's nothing worse than a convert". Near as I can tell, the secret to men is that we are easy. I think you should keep certain principles in mind: 1) We love to be needed, give us a problem we want to fix it. 2) We love to be complimented but we don't take correction or criticism well. 3) We like getting laid and will do almost anything if it increases our chances. 4) We like to look at pretty women, and I have to admit, there is something about Spandex and riding tights that are pretty nice. 5) We like activities that make us feel big, strong and "manly". Horseback riding does that. 6) We hate being told what to do. 7) Don't forget #3. If it helps, you might want to go to a fair or a few events. The fair is nice because you get to see that Riding isn't just a women's sport. You also get to see people doing things, and on top of that, there is all the equipment to review and judge. Riding events are nice in that you can see things in action. Finally, the one thing that surprised me most about crewing was just how much partying goes on at the ride camp. I was stunned by how much energy people had at the end of day despite either crewing or riding. You might want to have Husband come for that first. Charles ----- Original Message ----- From: "Tamara Taylor" <tam319@xxxxxxxxxxxxx> To: "Ridecamp" <ridecamp@xxxxxxxxxxxxx> Sent: Friday, March 28, 2003 10:41 PM Subject: [RC] Horses and Husbands Hello list, My husband and I were recently married (October) and we have been together for 4 years. Life is grand. He's my best friend in the world and we have a lot of fun together. The only thing is that he is as non-horsey as they come! I love riding and spending hours at the barn. My husband does not! There are several other couples at the barn where I board and they both come out and spend time at the barn together even if one of them is non-horsey and is just learning to ride. I am looking forward to travelling to rides and shows this summer but I don't think he will enjoy it much. I hate to drag him along if he's not going to love it too. He is supportive of my riding. He encourages me to go spend time with my horses because he knows it makes me happy. He doesn't gripe about all the financial costs. He even let my buy a new foal - my dream horse - last month despite our very meager budget. The foal has arrived but he hasn't even been out to the barn to see it yet. We own several dogs as well (my babies) and live in the city. He knows that I don't like to leave them crated for long periods of time so he works his schedule so that he can be home exercising the dogs while I ride. He is very accomodating. Now I realize that it is important to have your separate things to do in a relationship. But horses are a huge part of my life and I would like him to be a part of that aspect of my life. I will have a great ride and be beaming or just enjoying the company of a warm muzzle but I still feel like something is missing because I can't share it with him. If I ask he will come to the barn with me but I can tell how much it bores him so I don't bother asking anymore. Do any of you ever feel this way? What do you do to deal with it? Thanks, Tam =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Ridecamp is a service of Endurance Net, http://www.endurance.net. Information, Policy, Disclaimer: http://www.endurance.net/Ridecamp Subscribe/Unsubscribe http://www.endurance.net/ridecamp/logon.asp Ride Long and Ride Safe!! =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Ridecamp is a service of Endurance Net, http://www.endurance.net. Information, Policy, Disclaimer: http://www.endurance.net/Ridecamp Subscribe/Unsubscribe http://www.endurance.net/ridecamp/logon.asp Ride Long and Ride Safe!! =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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