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Pennsylvania Equine Council has been trying hard to get a law passed
similar to the one you mention. The trial lawyers lobby is stronger
(wealthier!) than we are, however, and we have been unsuccessful as yet.
Patty
>---------------------------
>
>Becky Huffman wrote:
>>
>> I love people who aren't' afraid to say 'this is the way it is", but
>If I
>> thought that 'see, everyone agrees with me...' would work I would
>not
>> hesitate to try it!
>>
>> My policy in the past has been to offer the helmet with a comment
>regarding
>> my possible silliness and the riders safety. I had never had anyone
>refuse
>> until her. The first time this came up, she said (QUOTE) "that
>> Christopher Reeve would have been better off if he had not had a
>helmet on"
>>
>> (the marriage counselor helped my husband and I tremendously, but I
>refuse
>> to spend $100/hr talking about Her problems)
>>
>> I do feel very strongly about adults making personal decisions and
>taking
>> responsibility for their own actions - BUT - My Real concern is for
>my
>> husbands emotional state (not her head).
>>
>> Cold-but true.
>> She is a real bitch (dont know how she raised my wonderful
>husband.)
>>
>> I was honestly interested what policies other people had at their
>barns.
>>
>> We still have not agreed on a 'helmet policy' but sometime those
>horses are
>> very difficult to get up out of the back pasture.!
>>
>> Becky & The SpazRat (nobody rides but mom)
>> hhcc1@htcomp.net
>>
>> ----------
>> > From: K S Swigart <katswig@deltanet.com>
>> > To: Becky Huffman <hhcc1@htcomp.net>
>> > Cc: ride camp <ridecamp@endurance.net>
>> > Subject: Re: visitors AND RIDING SAFETY
>> > Date: Saturday, May 31, 1997 12:28 PM
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> > On Tue, 27 May 1997, Becky Huffman wrote:
>> >
>> > > She flat-out refuses to wear a helmet
>> > >
>> > > My thoughts - no helmet - no riding
>> > >
>> > > This is my mother-in-law and my husband does not think she
>should have
>> to
>> > > wear one.
>> >
>> > There are several points here:
>> >
>> > 1. This person is an adult, and is perfectly entitle to choose
>not to
>> > wear a helmet if she so desires.
>> >
>> > 2. This is your horse and you are entitled to refuse to let
>anybody ride
>> > it for any reason, and obviously you feel strongly about the
>helmet
>> issue.
>> >
>> > 3. This is your mother-in-law, and your husband agrees with her.
>> >
>> > A situation that is beautifully designed to cause all kinds of
>family
>> > problems, no matter what you decide.
>> >
>> > Quite frankly, I suspect that your motivation in asking "ridecamp"
>this
>> > question is so that you can get all kinds of people who agree with
>you
>> and
>> > you can shove all those agreements under the nose of your husband
>and
>> > mother-in-law and say "See, all these people agree with me. You
>SHOULD
>> > wear a helmet, and I am not being unreasonable in requiring it."
>> > (Personally, if somebody tried that on me, I might dig my feet in
>even
>> > more, and become more insistent in my refusal to "do what it best
>for
>> > me." So just be aware that this method may backfire on you.)
>> >
>> > What is the right thing to do in this situation depends not upon
>who
>> > agrees whether it is important for adults to wear helmets riding
>horses,
>> > but rather depends upon the personalities of the individuals
>involved.
>> > Nobody is "right" in this situation. And certainly nobody on
>ridecamp
>> can
>> > help you in deciding what it the best thing to do in this
>situation,
>> > considering that none of us knows any of the people involved.
>Certainly,
>> > none of us knows the best way for you to tell your mother-in-law
>what she
>> > should or should not be doing.
>> >
>> > You would do better (if you needed advice) to consult a marriage
>or
>> family
>> > counselor, but ultimately it is up to you to decide whether you
>are
>> > willing to allow something that is against your better judgement
>for the
>> > sake of family harmony.
>> >
>> > For my take, though...
>> >
>> > It has been a long time since I have chosen to take responsibility
>for
>> the
>> > self-destructive actions of adults. I would consider it my
>obligation to
>> > point out that wearing a helmet is considered an important safety
>> > precaution when riding horses, and then, if she fell off and
>cracked open
>> > her head you would be entirely justified in saying, "I told you
>so."
>> >
>> > If, on the other hand, you are of the opinion that your
>mother-in-law is
>> > not expert enough to ride this particular horse, telling her that
>she can
>> > only ride if she wears a helmet (knowing that she won't) is a
>great way
>> to
>> > avoid having to tell her, "I'm sorry, you can't ride my horse, you
>aren't
>> > good enough."
>> >
>> > If, what you really want, is for her to ride your horse with a
>helmet on,
>> > what you could say is, "I know it's really silly of me, but I have
>this
>> > thing about riding with a helmet because I have heard/seen such
>AWFUL
>> > things that can happen to people who don't wear helmets, and I
>care SO
>> > MUCH about you that I don't want the same thing to happen to you.
>I know
>> > you think you can do it without getting hurt, and you are probably
>right,
>> > but I just can't help it; I couldn't enjoy it just for thinking
>about
>> what
>> > might happen to you....."
>> >
>> > You get my drift. You could then repeat something in the same
>vein to
>> > your husband, "I know it's silly of me, and she will probably be
>just
>> > fine, but I care so much about her that I just wouldn't be able to
>enjoy
>> > it....."
>> >
>> > Only the most churlish of mother-in-laws would then coldly insist
>that
>> > your feelings didn't matter and that they wanted to do it anyway.
>> >
>> > This way, you aren't telling her that she SHOULD do it because it
>is
>> > what's best for her (as if she were one of your children--which
>she is
>> > not).
>> >
>> > Incidentally, it is possible to persist in this vein until she
>> > capitulates; if it is done artfully.
>> >
>> > kat
>> > Orange County, Calif.
>> >
>
>--
>-----------------------------------------------------------
>Frank W. Vans Evers
>mailto:vans@cyberspy.com or mailto:vans@ccfs.centcom.mil
>
>
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