Endurance.Net Ridecamp Archives

ROFLMAO!  Right on!  This is by and far the most apt diagnosis/prognosis I have ever read.  At least, now, we have another acronyn to add to the already ever growing equine malise!  Thank you.  LOL!

 

D'Arcy
 

On 1/2/08, Tom Sites <goearth@xxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:

 

 

 

Living with O.C.E.A.N. Syndrome
 Just recently, after years of research, I have finally been able to
 give a name to what my wife and I have been living with for years.
 It's an affliction, for sure, which when undiagnosed and
 misunderstood can devastate and literally tear a family apart. Very
 little is known about O.C.E.A.N. Syndrome. But it is my hope this
 article will generate interest from researchers involved in the equine
 and psychological sciences. You will, no doubt, begin to identify
similar symptoms in your own family and hopefully now be able to cope.
Obsessive Compulsive Equine Attachment Neurosis Syndrome
(O.C.E.A.N.S) is usually found in the female and can manifest itself
anytime from birth to the golden years. Symptoms may appear any time
 and may even go dormant in the late teens, but the syndrome frequently
 

re-emerges in later years.
 Symptoms vary widely in both number and degree of severity. Allow me to
 share some examples which are most prominent in our home.
 The afflicted individual:
1. Can smell moldy hay at ten paces, but can't tell whether milk has
gone bad until it turns chunky.
 2. Finds the occasional "Buck and Toot" session hugely entertaining, but 
severely chastises her husband for similar antics.
 3. Will spend hours cleaning and conditioning her tack, but wants to
 eat on paper plates so there are no dishes.
 4. Considers equine gaseous excretions a fragrance. 5. Enjoys mucking out four stalls twice a day, but insists on having a
 housekeeper mop the kitchen floor once a week.
 6. Will spend an hour combing and trimming an equine mane, but wears a
 baseball cap so she doesn't waste time brushing her own hair.
 7. Will dig through manure piles daily looking for worms, but does not
 fish.

  8. Will not hesitate to administer a rectal exam up to her shoulder,
 but finds cleaning out the Thanksgiving turkey cavity for dressing
quite repulsive.
 9. By memory can mix eight different supplements in the correct
 proportions, but can't make macaroni and cheese that isn't soupy.
 10. Twice a week will spend an hour scrubbing algae from the water
 tanks, but has a problem cleaning lasagna out of the casserole dish.
 11. Will pick a horse's nose, and call it cleaning, but becomes
 verbally violent when her husband picks his.                   12. Can sit through a four-hour session of a ground work clinic, but
 unable to make it through a half-hour episode of Cops.
 The spouse of an afflicted victim:

1. Must come to terms with the fact there is no cure, and only slightly
 effective treatments. The syndrome may be genetic or caused by the
 inhaling of manure particles which, I propose, have an adverse effect
 on female hormones.
2. Must adjust the family budget to include equine items - hay,
 veterinarian services, farrier services, riding boots and clothes,
 supplements, tack, equine masseuse and acupuncturist - as well as the
 (mandatory) equine spiritual guide, etc. Once you have identified a
 monthly figure, never look at it again. Doing so will cause tightness
 in your chest, nausea and occasional diarrhea.
 3. Must realize that your spouse has no control over this affliction. 
More often than not, she will deny a problem even exists as denial is  common.
 4. Must form a support group. You need to know you're not alone - and there's no shame in admitting your wife has a problem. My support group, for instance, involves men who truly enjoy Harley Davidson's, four-day weekends and lots of scotch. Most times, she is unaware that I am even gone, until the precise moment she needs help getting a 50-pound bag of grain out of the truck.
 Now you can better see how O.C.E.A.N.S. affects countless households in this country and abroad. It knows no racial, ethnic or religious boundaries. It is a syndrome that will be difficult to treat becausethose most affected are in denial and therefore, not interested in a cure.
So, I am taking it upon myself to be constantly diligent in my researchin order to pass along information to make it easier for caretakers to cope on a day to day basis.

Katrin Klemm 
 





 

-- 
D'Arcy L. Demianoff-Thompson
cest.mon.virage@xxxxxxxxx

"Re-examine all you have been told . . . dismiss what insults your soul."

--Walt Whitman