[RC] Found it! I win :-) - rides2farHa! Found it in the archives. I made up that list at midnight, Jan. 8, 1999. Now I see why they changed some of them...I suppose they were just too endurance related for them. (they knew more about puns than pulses) The original "list" is below the opening paragraph. To: rides2far@xxxxxxxx Subject: COMPARING: Horse or One Great Love? From: rides2far@xxxxxxxx (Angela C. McGhee) Date: Fri, 8 Jan 1999 00:38:26 -0500 , "You may have >oneGreat Love (meaning a man or a woman) or one Great Horse in yourlife, >how >would you answer? Frank, since there's been so much interest in your post, I decided you deserved a more in depth answer. Perhaps we'd better do a little comparasin shopping. So, I'll compare and contrast a great husband and a great horse. CONTRAST: 1. Horses tend to walk into a clean stall and immediately take a dump. Husbands tend to walk into a clean house and immediately hand their shirt on the bed post. They're even. 2. Horses are willing to eat the same thing at every meal and you don't have to wash the dishes. You don't have to put on your coat and boots or go outside to feed you husband. even again. 3. Horses don't talk. Oops. Neither do husbands. even. 4. It feels great to have a good horse between your knees... Same goes for a husband. >eg< husband wins, he can keep your back warm and you don't have to walk him during the night. GOOD THINGS ABOUT HUSBANDS: 1. Husbands are less expensive to shoe. 2. Feeding a husband doesn't require anything that even mildly compares with the hassle of putting up hay. 3. A lame husband can still work. 4. A husband with a belly-ache is capable of puking. 5. Husbands don't try to scratch their heads on your back. 6. They're more fun when their pulse is elevated. 7. If they're playing hard to catch you *may* be able to run them down on foot. 8. They know their name. 9. They pay their own bills. 10. They apologize when they step on your toes. 11. No saddle fitting problems. 12. They seldom refuse to get in the vehicle. 13. They don't panic, yelling and running all through the house when you leave them alone. (unless you left the kids too) 14. For a nominal fee you can hire someone else to clip them. 15. He wouldn't like the lady next door just as well as he likes you if she fed him 3 days straight. THE HORSE'S ADVANTAGE: 1.If they don't work out you can sell them. 2.They don't come with in-laws. 3.You don't have to worry about your children looking like them. 4.You never have to iron their saddle pads. 5. If you get too fat for one you can shop for a bigger one. 6.They smell good when they sweat. 7. You can repair their "clothes" with duct tape. 8. It's possible to keep them from "jumping the fence". 9.You can force them to stay in good physical condition...with a whip if necessary. 10. They don't want their turn at the computer. 11. They turn white with age, but not bald. 12.They've never *heard* of PMS. 13. They learn to accept restraint. Oh well, 15 to 13. The husband still wins... Especially when he doesn't complain when you reboot up the computer at 12 midnight because you thought of something else you wanted to post. Angie Found where this had been sent to me a few weeks after I'd posted that. Guess they revised it and sent it around right away. Angie- This is circulating on the Standardbred pleasure horse list. >Thought it sounded a bit like your post of a couple of weeks ago.... GOOD THINGS ABOUT HUSBANDS: 1. Husbands are less expensive to shoe. 2. Feeding a husband doesn't require anything that even mildly compares with the hassle of putting up hay. 3. A lame husband can still work. 4. A husband with a belly-ache doesn't have to be walked. 5. Husbands don't try to scratch their heads on your back. NOT MINE>>> 6. They're better able to understand puns. 7. If they're playing hard to catch you *may* be able to run them down on foot. 8. They know their name. 9. They pay their own bills. 10.They apologize when they step on your toes. 11.No saddle fitting problems. 12.They seldom refuse to get in the vehicle. 13.They don't panic, yelling and running all through the house when you leave them alone. (unless you left the kids too) 14.For a nominal fee you can hire someone else to clip them. They don't like the lady next door just as well as you just because she fed him 3 days straight. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ THE HORSE'S ADVANTAGE: 1.If they don't work out you can sell them. 2.They don't come with in-laws. 3.You don't have to worry about your children looking like them. 4.You never have to iron their saddle pads. 5. If you get too fat for one you can shop for a bigger one. 6.They smell good when they sweat. 7. You can repair their "clothes" with duct tape. 8. It's possible to keep them from "jumping the fence". 9.You can force them to stay in good physical condition...with a whip if necessary. 10.They don't want their turn at the computer. 11.They turn white with age, but not bald. 12.They've never *heard* of PMS. 13.They learn to accept restraint. NOT MINE 14.They love to go trail riding. NOT MINE 15.They don't care what you look like, as long as you have a carrot. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ________________________________________________________________ The best thing to hit the internet in years - Juno SpeedBand! Surf the web up to FIVE TIMES FASTER! Only $14.95/ month - visit www.juno.com to sign up today! =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Ridecamp is a service of Endurance Net, http://www.endurance.net. 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