 |
[RC] Husbands and horses - Andrea DayAh, Tamara, Tamara! May I ask just how long you've been married? Having been there and still doing that for the last 25+ years, I can tell you that it really is kinda nice not to have a husband who with the same interest as you have. It's fun to go to endurance rides with girlfriends and yakyak about girl stuff. And I know about limited budgets--be VERY glad he doesn't want to have much to do with horses! My guy is very strongly behind me riding (he knows I'd be bonkers otherwise) and he listens patiently while I go on about what happened with this horse or on that ride. He'll work on the truck, rewire the trailer, put up fence, and feed while I'm gone, but he doesn't WANT to go to endurance rides. He has his photography and painting, and I have horses. Photography and painting are not something I do or that I'd ever choose to pursue, but having him share a bit of that with me expands my horizons, and I think that the horses do that for him. It certainly helps that they are in the backyard and we can watch their antics out the window. My husband does ride some--maybe twice a year he'll get on a horse and ride out in the backcountry if I plan something special--last summer it was a 20 mile round trip ride across the mountains to a little mining town for lunch and a beer! Ah, beer, now THAT'S incentive. It's pretty disgusting--he hardly ever rides, but he has this great natural balance and never gets sore. But then he won't hardly look at the horses for months at a time, so it's obvious that he's riding for the sake of going somewhere rather than for the sake of being with a horse. I used to really wish that he'd come to rides with me and do MY thing, but I've come to realize that there are other things that we both enjoy doing, like hiking and fishing, that are even more enjoyable because we BOTH have that interest. Plus, I don't mind planning a special trip once in a while, but I don't want to have to coax him and fuss around wearing Victoria's Secret undies just to get his attention when I can call a friend who really wants to ride. You might want to watch some of the couples that go together all the time to endurance rides. I must admit, there are times that I almost wish I had a husband that would ride with me, and then there are the times you ride for 15 miles behind a couple who are snipping and snapping at each other and you realize that going alone can be pretty nice! I guess what I'm trying to say is that it's good to have a life together, but it's also good to have your own interests apart. Don't leave him out of that part of your life, keep him informed, but don't push him to share it, because he'll probably pull away as hard as you're pushing. (It's a guy kinda thing.) If you're really dead set on trying to make a horseman out of him, the one big suggestion I have is try to rent/buy a place where you can keep your horses on your own property. Sounds like he got involved with your dogs because he's in direct contact with them and got to know them as individuals. Perhaps when he gets to know the horses, it might be the same. Happy Trails, Andrea _________________________________________________________________ Tired of spam? Get advanced junk mail protection with MSN 8. http://join.msn.com/?page=features/junkmail
Ride Long and Ride Safe!! =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
|