Ridecamp: [RC] The Rubberband Snapped

The continuing saga of Braveheart and Chickenshit.

Braveheart called Friday evening to switch our schlep from Sunday to
Saturday.  The training ride she was supposed to take Friday had to be
postponed until Sunday.  So we met at the barn early this morning with
the intention of doing the ride we had originally planned for last week,
but cut short because of heat and tired bones.

Fortunately the horses had been fed at their normal time, so Caddie had
been able to down half her breakfast, and RB almost all of his (the
difference in the amounts they're given is astonishing - Caddie's half a
meal is just about the same amount as RB's full meal).  Caddie was full
enough not to be bothered by leaving.  RB was still really hungry when we
left and searched for food almost the entire ride.  

I think RB's trot-fest with a seasoned endurance horse that has as big a
trot as he does gave him a finer appreciation for our schleps.  He was in
no mind whatsoever to take off.  He was even appreciative of our taking
the lead for awhile.  Normally when Caddie is in front I hear a lot of
cursing going on, but today all I heard was sugar coated praises.  I
almost went into insulin shock there was so much sweet talk going on
behind me.

This ride was starting out so boring I don't recall a single incident
worth mentioning.  I can report on RB's progress as a trail horse though.
 He is amazing.  Sometimes when the trail is narrow and riders are coming
in the opposite direction it is necessary for someone to pull off to the
side so the others can pass.  Well, Caddie is one of those horses that
feels the others need to get out of her way.  She IS the Queen.  She gets
more than a little bent out of shape when I make her step off the trail
out of the way.  She doesn't kick or anything.  She just waits to get out
of the way until I drill a hole in her side with my spur.  RB, on the
other hand, has learned trail etiquette so quickly that today when horses
came toward us on narrow sections of the trail he would just
automatically step off the trail and stop.  Braveheart never had to ask
him to do it.  He may like to eat shit, but he sure doesn't have shit for
brains.  He's amazing.  

We crossed the river, after having spent nearly ten minutes standing
there drinking (RB was like a camel today, drink, drink drink.  I'm
surprised he didn't sprout a hump), and turned in a direction Caddie and
I had never been in before.  RB was there Wednesday on his training ride.
 Caddie doesn't normally appreciate going places she's never been before,
but she was very good today.  Took the lead coming out of the river and
had no problems maintaining it.  RB didn't seem to mind either. 

We crisscrossed the river a couple of times, and plowed through some mud
that really wasn't as bad as it looked.  A coyote crossed the trail in
front of us, but Caddie ignored it.  RB didn't like it, definitely knew
it was a wild animal and not just a dog, but he didn't pitch any sort of
a fit either.  We came to a deep water hole (not the one used on the
Riverdance ride), Caddie did not like the water touching her belly, so
there was no stopping and drinking at that spot, but RB enjoyed the
cooling bath.  Braveheart's feet were immersed in the water, but my heels
barely got wet (there are several advantages to riding large horses -
disadvantages too, but my feet don't get wet).  We came out onto the
'running road' that took us back to the caretakers house on the nature
preserve.  All the while, absolutely no incidents took place.  It truly
was a pretty boring ride up to this point.

We tanked up on water at the caretakers house and allowed the horses to
munch on some grass.  Caddie just wanted to go home at this point and
refused to find any grass worth munching on, so she kept walking off and
circling back trying to entice RB to leave the grass.  No chance of that
happening.  RB was firmly planted at the buffet table with his head in
the salad bowl.

Several members of Braveheart's trail staff for the Norco ride were
working by the house, so we went over to talk to them about the up coming
ride.  Caddie desperately wanted to scratch her head, or have it
scratched for her, so she was pestering Braveheart to do it.  When
Braveheart finally made it clear she wasn't going to allow her to rub on
her Caddie tentatively turned to RB.  Now, earlier that morning, Caddie
allowed RB to rub himself on her neck and her rump, so when she tried to
rub back on him she rubbed so hard she almost pushed him over.  RB gave
her a swift swipe with a hind leg (never came near touching her, but he
gave fair warning that hard pushing wouldn't be accepted).  Caddie loves
a good, hard rub.  Ever so carefully Caddie put her head on RB's flank
and started rubbing.  No response from RB.  Caddie went a little farther
down with her neck and started rubbing on RB's hind leg.  No response. 
Caddie came up with her head and crossed RB's croup with a good chin rub.
 No response.  GREAT!  Now it was time for the ultimate test.  Could this
little horse withstand the pressure of holding up her 400 pound head? 
She licked RB's back a couple of times and then rested her chin on his
spine just behind the saddle, and relaxed.  Braveheart was still chatting
away with her friends, and Caddie was napping on RB's back.  Ever so
slightly I watched as RB shifted his hind legs so they were square
underneath him.  Is that love or what. 

It was time to go.  RB started trotting and actually slowed down to a
nice little jog with Caddie behind him.  All was going pretty smoothly
until I refused to allow Caddie to run up a hill.  I wanted her to trot. 
We got off the dirt road and struck out across a barren field.  RB was in
a really nice trot.  One Caddie was perfectly capable of trotting beside,
but she was pissed now, and was letting me know how much.  She's trying
to canter.  I'm holding her back.  With every leap she's grunting and
tossing her head.  That set RB off.  He didn't know what was happening,
but he didn't want to be anywhere near it, so he tried to take off.  That
only aroused Caddie all the more.  It was time to stop.  We gave them a
second to gather their senses and continued on. 

We came to another hill that we have always cantered up in the past.  We
were trotting at the time.  Everyone seemed to be back under control.  RB
was in front trotting along nicely, but picking up his pace just a hair
to get up the hill.  Caddie broke into a nice little canter, and since
she was in control I let her stay in it.  Big mistake.  We passed RB.  RB
tried to break into a canter too.  Braveheart said no.  If he had just
sped up that trot everything would have been fine, but he wanted to do
the same thing as Caddie.  When Braveheart said no RB let loose with a
tantrum the size of Texas.  I glanced to my right and saw ... "coming out
of shoot number 3, Braveheart on 2002's Bucking Bronc of the Year,
Celesteele" ... YIKES!  We are talking Big Time Rodeo, PRCA sanctioned. 
Braveheart wasn't able to stay on for the full 8 seconds.  And I
certainly wasn't going to play 'pickup man'.  Braveheart lasted maybe 3
seconds.  RB had just finished his head between the front legs, hind legs
up in the air leap.  He landed and was gathering himself for another
leap, but Braveheart didn't have anything to brace herself against.  With
no neck in front of her to grab onto Braveheart lost her balance when RB
landed and her momentum carried her down the side of her horse flat onto
her back.  OUCH!!  RB continued bucking across in front of us and looked
like he was going to take off running across the field, but Braveheart
called to him and he turned back.  Personally, I would have stayed on the
ground for awhile, but Braveheart just jumped right up.  RB was standing
next to Caddie and I, but just out of my reach, so I couldn't grab hold
of his reins.  Caddie was not inclined to step over any closer to this
madman, so I just kept talking to him while Braveheart walked over and
got him.  She looked him in the eye and said, "That HURT!"  And, I swear,
RB lowered his head in shame.  Braveheart said she was OK.  Nothing
broken, but she was going to have to see a chiropractor before leaving
for Alaska this Thursday.  She walked for a couple of minutes to let RB
think about what he had done, and he was doing just that too.  When she
finally got back on board he behaved for a little while.  

Caddie threw a monkey wrench into the works once again by trying to run
up a hill behind RB.  I was able to keep her behind him, but her legs
were going 90 miles an hour (they were just doing it in place).  All that
stomping behind him, plus some horses in front of us, made RB have a
second melt down.  Nowhere near as bad as the first, but the tossing head
and half spins were enough to make Braveheart resort to a few fists on
his neck.  RB never really settled down until we passed a rider that was
making his horse turn in circles every few paces (we never did figure out
what that was all about), and when another group of riders in front of us
got out of sight.  When it was back to being just the two of us (four of
us?) he calmed down.  

Caddie had pooped a couple of times on the ride already and RB was able
to be persuaded to walk away from them, but the last time she pooped he
refused to go forward without a cookie.  He was straddling the poop pile
when a car came by us that made him stand up.  Instead of just continuing
on, he backed up until he was by the poop again.  It's pretty pathetic,
but Braveheart let him have his cookie.  The problem is, he wanted two
cookies.  Braveheart kicked and kicked, but he just wasn't going to
budge.  She finally pulled his head up and kicked again and RB
reluctantly stepped over the poop and we continued home.

One last spook under the flag at 6th and Pedley had RB skittering into
the street, where he finally slipped.  That brought the spook to a quick
halt (he's never slipped on the street before).  We sauntered across the
street and never paid the refrigerator sitting out by the trail any mind.
 Today was the longest time they've ever been out, 4 1/2 hours.  Caddie
just wanted to go home and finish her breakfast.  RB was ready to call it
quits too.  That's something new.  

I bought Braveheart a beer with her lunch.  Mr Elusive joined us and we
talked about Alaska.  Hope you have a great vacation, Braveheart.  Lord
knows you deserve one.  Hope you're okay.  Pleasant flight(s).  Good
fishing.  Have fun.

Chickenshit 

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