Subject: Horse v. 1.0
Dear Tech Support:
Recently I
purchased and installed Horse 1.0. Immediately, I
noticed that this
program has numerous glitches. For instance,
every time my computer boots
up, I have to run Feed 5.3 and
Water 7.1. Many times I've been in the
middle of writing an
important document, and a window will flash telling
me to
run Clean Stall 2.0. This program also contained applications
I
did not wish to install, such as Manure 8.5; however they
auto-installed
with Horse 1.0.
Applications such as Vacation 2.7 and Free Time 10.1
can no longer
run, crashing whenever selected. Possibly the worst is that
Horse 1.0
has attached itself to programs like Finance Manager and MS
Money,
with folders added such as "Monthly Shoeing" and "Winter Blanket".
Periodically, I'll get a reminder telling me to send a check to the
manufacturer of Horse 1.0 for the aforementioned items.
I have
tried to uninstall Horse 1.0 numerous times, but when I try to
run the
uninstall program, I get warning messages telling me that a
deadly virus
known as "Withdrawal" will infect my system. Please
Help!!!!!
THE
REPLY:
Dear User,
Your complaint is not unusual. A common
misconception among
users is that Horse 1.0 is a mere "utilities and
entertainment
program."
It is not-- it is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is
designed by its creator
to run everything! A warning will soon be
imprinted on the box.
Since
you have already installed
Horse 1.0, here are a few tips on how to
make
it run better.
If
you are annoyed by the applications Feed 5.3 and
Water 7.1, you may run
C:\HIRE HELP; however, this will cause another
folder to be added to
financial applications, labeled "Staff".
Failure to
send payment
to "Staff" will result in Feed 5.3 and Water
7.1 being run again on
startup.
A note of caution: NOT booting up your computer for several
days
isn't the solution to avoiding Feed 5.3 and Water 7.1. You will find
that when you boot up your computer again a nasty virus
called "Colic
4.2" will have attached itself to important documents
and the only way to
rid your computer of Colic 4.2 is by purchasing
and installing extremely
expensive, but crucial, "Vet 10.1".
Otherwise,
Colic 4.2 will cause
irreversible damage to the operating system.
Finally, it is important that
you run C:\Carrots and C:\Scratch Ears
on a fairly regular basis to keep
the application running smoothly.
If you have any more questions, please
call our toll free number.
Sincerely,
Tech Support
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