Y'allbonics

["Karen J. Zelinsky" <kjz2@juno.com>]

Good Morning Ridecampers! . . . .
Couldn't help it!  After having a "viewing" of some of ya suthners, this
kinda rings a bell in ma hed!  And y'all no who this sownds like!  Fess
up!!!!  We know who you are and how you talk!! Can you guys help tell me
how this relates to ridecamp topics? 
 Hope y'all enjoy!!!
Karen from Pa.  (in born-again deep-freeze mode)..
 ______________________________________________________

 ANY GOOD SOUTH'NER WORTH THEIR WEIGHT IN PEACHES WILL UNDERSTAND EVERY
SINGLE WORD BELOW!
 >
 > The Association of Southern Schools has decided to pursue some of the
 > seemingly endless taxpayer dollar pipeline through Washington
designating
 > Southern slang, or y'allbonics, as a language to be taught in all
Southern
 > schools. The following are excerpts from the Y'allbonics/ English
dictionary
 >
 > HEIDI - (noun) -Greeting.
 > HIRE YEW - Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting.
 > Usage:  "Heidi, Hire yew?"
 >
 > BARD - (verb) - Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow."
 > Usage:  "My brother bard my pickup truck."
 >
 > JAWJUH - (noun) - The state north of Florida. Capitol is Lanner.
 > Usage:  "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck."
 >
 > BAMMER - (noun) - The state west of Jawjuh. Capitol is
Berminhayum.(wrong)
 > Usage:  "A tornader jes went through Bammer an' left $20,000,000 in
 > improvements."
 >
 > MUNTS - (noun) - A calendar division.
 > Usage:  "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck, and I ain't herd
 from
 > him in munts."
 >
 > THANK - (verb) - Cognitive process.
 > Usage:  "Ah thank ah'll have a bare."
 >
 > BARE - (noun) - An alcoholic beverage made of barley, hops, and yeast.
 > Usage:  "Ah thank ah'll have a bare."
 >
 > IGNERT - (adjective) - Not smart. See "Arkansas native."
 > Usage:  "Them bammer boys sure are ignert!"
 >
 > RANCH - (noun) - A tool used for tight'nin' bolts.
 > Usage:  "I thank I left my ranch in the back of that pickup truck my
 brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago."
 >
 > ALL - (noun) - A petroleum-based lubricant.
 > Usage:  "I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts all in my pickup
truck."
 >
 > FAR - (noun) - A conflagration.
 > Usage:  "If my brother from Jawjuh don't change the all in my pickup
truck, that thing's gonna catch far."
 >
 > TAR - (noun) - A rubber wheel.
 > Usage:  "Gee, I hope that brother of mine from Jawjuh don't git a flat
tar
 > in my pickup truck."
 >
 > TIRE - (noun) - A tall monument.
 > Usage:  "Lord willin' and the creek don't rise, I sure do hope to see
that
 > Eiffel Tire in Paris sometime."
 >
 > RETARD - (verb) - To stop working.
 > Usage:  "My grampaw retard at age 65."
 >
 > FAT - (noun), (verb) - a battle or combat; to engage in battle or
combat.
 > Usage:  "You younguns keep fat'n, n' ah'm gonna whup y'uh."
 >
 > RATS - (noun) - Entitled power or privilege.
 > Usage:  "We Southerners are willin' to fat for are rats."
 >
 > CHEER - (adverb) In this place.
 > Usage:  "Just set that bare rat cheer."
 >
 > FARN - (adjective) - Not domestic.
 > Usage:  "I cuddint unnerstand a wurd he sed... must be from some farn
 > country."
 >
 > DID- (adjective) - Not alive.
 > Usage:  "He's did, Jim."
 >
 > ARE - (noun) - A colorless, odorless gas Oxygen.
 > Usage:  "He cain't breathe...give 'im some ARE!"
 >
 > BOB WAR - (noun) - A sharp, twisted cable.
 > Usage:  "Boy, stay away from that bob war fence."
 >
 > JEW HERE - (noun) and (verb) contraction.
 > Usage:  "Jew here that my brother from Jawjuh got a job with that bob
war
 > fence cump'ny?"
 >
 > HAZE - a contraction.
 > Usage:  "Is Bubba smart?" "Nah...haze ignert. He ain't thanked but a
 > minnit'n 'is laf."
 >
 > SEED - (verb) - past tense of "to see".
 >
 > VIEW - contraction (verb) and pronoun.
 > Usage:  "I ain't never seed New York City... view?"
 >
 > GUBMINT - (noun) - A bureaucratic institution.
 > Usage:  "Them gubmint boys shore is ignert.

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