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1) Hire highly-paid equine nutritionist to live in your barn, spending
24 hours a day weighing out feed via gram scale and tweezers, analyzing
hourly feed samples and pulling large blood samples from horses eighteen
times a day to explain mysterious progressive anemia. Horses later die
of blood loss, but nutritionist publishes scientific paper on the event,
blaming it all on Southwest-grown alfalfa and rice bran.
2) Owner loses all sense of perspective when lab feed analysis shows
lysine to be deficient by .000001 micrograms. Goes on tri-state killing
spree and spends rest of life drowsing happily in institution for the
Criminally Insane And Also Endurance Riders subsisting on massive doses
of thorazine, mumbling incoherently about enteroliths and the best
prices for Adequan.
3) Owner maintains sense of The Big Picture and does the right thing
for his horses by selling home, car, his left kidney and all possessions
other than horses and tack to finance the daily feed analysis and
live-in nutritionist now living in Owner's former home. Lives in
cardboard box outside horse's stall, serene and content in the knowledge
that Muffy's nutrition level is the best to be had. Neighborhood kids
feed persimmons to horses throught the fence, cause impactions and all
the horses die, anyway. Owner moves on to scenario described in #2.
4) Owner comes to senses midway through selling left kidney and beats
nutritionist to death with the latest copy of NRC Nutrient Requirements
for Horses. Buries body in pasture, where additional soil
supplementation provided by dead body tissue decomposition causes a
bumper crop of rich, lush pasture grass, rich in amino acids. Horses
win North American Championship and proud owner writes best-seller
"Nutrition for the Endurance Horse---a Guide to Dealing with Pesky
Children and Amway Distributors".
<g>
Susan Garlinghouse
Mike Sofen wrote:
>
> So, to summarize all of the equine nutritional advice of the last few weeks:
>
> Feed your horse grass hay only, unless you live where grass hay doesn't grow in which case feed whatever you can get but lay awake at night worrying about it.
> Feed supplemental lysine from soybeans but only if whatever else you're feeding doesn't have enough or if your horse works extra hard or if you're staying up at night worrying about it.
> Feed vitamin and mineral supplements based on scoop size no matter what the label says because the labels are all wrong and besides, you'd just stay up at night worrying if your horse didn't get enough.
> Feed fat (oil) to your horse for extra calories but only if he's not eating barley or wheat hay and only if extra Vitamin E is being added and only if he's got a penchant french fries. Or stay up at night and worry about it.
> If you're forced to feed wheat or oat hay, be sure to have your razors ready to shave off the beards, otherwise you'll stay up at night worrying that your horse will catch one in his throat.
> If you live near a golf course, let them eat there.
> If you live near the ocean, too bad. Most horses will not eat seaweed.
> If you live in the desert, too bad. Most horses will not eat cactus.
> Give shots of Adequan every three days, just on general principles. I'd suggest every day shots, but someone would claim I was being elitist.
> If your horse doesn't "improve" with the Adequan alone, combine it with Coseqan, Bute, Selsun Blue, and Preparation-H.
>
> That about covers it, right guys? <g>
>
> Mike Sofen
> Seattle, WA
> ps: Now matter what I've said above, the nutrition threads have been OUTSTANDING!
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