No Subject

[Liz Newfield <lizfield@jeffnet.org>]

>
>
I think someone was looking for this.
>
>Horse Rules
>1. I CAN walk and poop at the same time.  I can, I can, I can.
>2. I will NOT stop and poop or urinate every time I pass the same spot 
>    in the arena.
>3. I will NOT leave when my rider falls off. 
>4. My stall is NOT my litter box.   When I have free access to my paddock,
>    I will NOT go back inside to pee.
>5. I will NOT roll in streams or try to roll when my human is on my 
>    back.
>6. I will NOT leap over large nonexistent obstacles when the whim strikes.
>7. I will NOT walk faster on the way home than I did on the way out. 
>8. I promise NOT to swish my tail while my human is cleaning my back feet. 
>9. I promise also NOT to choose that particular time to answer nature's
call. 
>10. I will NOT bite my shoer's butt just because it's there. 
>11. I will NOT confuse my human's blonde hair for really soft hay. 
>12. I will NOT wipe green slime down the back of my human's white shirt. 
>13. I will NOT blow my nose on my human. 
>14. I will NOT try to mooch goodies off of every human within a 1 mile
>      radius.
>15. I will NOT lay totally flat out in my stall with my eyes glazed over 
>     and my legs straight out and pretend I can't hear my human frantically 
>     screaming "Are you asleep?"
>16. I will NOT chase the ponies into the electric fence to see it it is on. 
>17. I will promise NEVER to dump the wheelbarrow of manure over while
>     my human is mucking my stall. 
>18. I will NOT grab my lead rope in my mouth and attempt to lead myself. 
>19. I will NOT have aan attitude problem. I won't, I won't, I won't. 
>20. I will not play termite or carpenter. I promise I won't eat or remodel
>     the barn. 
>21. I am NOT a Shin'a'in Battlesteed. I will not act like one. 
>22. I WILL forgive my human for the very bad haircut, even though I look
>     like a freak. 
>23. I accept that not every carrot is for me. 
>24. I will NOT do the Arab Teleport Trick when a bad/naughty/awful
>     Horsasaurus Monster breathes at me. 
>25. I will NOT jump in the air, turn 180 degrees every time I see a deer. 
>
>Attachment Converted: "c:\eudora\attach\foundthe.htm"
>


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