Re: Men in tights...

["Howard Bramhall" <hwb67@msn.com>]

----- Original Message -----

From: Tim Worden

Sent: Saturday, December 08, 2001 10:11 PM

To: RideCamp EnduranceNet

Subject: RC: Men in tights...

 

Ok guys...I hear tights are the way to go when it
comes to endurance.  All these magazines and website
mostly list tights for women.  Any advise on what us
men should wear for comfort?  What brands are guys
using?  I'm assuming I'll need riding tights for my
best comfort and performance over the long fast miles.
Since my wife said I wouldn't make it 25+ miles in my
extremely comfy $13 Wal-Mart Rustler jeans...I love
these jeans.

 

-------

Tim, I'm sorry to inform you, as with most things having to do with endurance riding, everything, and I mean everything that pertains to equestrian rider attire, is geared to the female sex.  Men receive second priority, and they only make second place because there's only two choices.  IF their were a third sex (geldings), then males would receive third place.  In other words, we always come in last.  And don't think I'm trying to be funny with the gelding thing.  I've met quite a few female endurance riders who truly believe that human male geldings would greatly improve our sport.

There are male tights, I ride in them myself (I have little pride left these days), and I'm told, by one or two older and extremely nearsighted women (this does include my wife), that my butt actually looks firm and taught in these things.  But my legs, well, let's just say I don't get very many compliments concerning my short bow legged lower limbs.  Doesn't matter; I leave my ego (what little is left) at home when I leave to attend an endurance ride where the ratio is 9.5 female to .5 male. 

So, anyway, we pay top dollar for these things.  Has to do with the laws of supply and demand.  Little demand, short supply, top dollar.  It's always ten or twenty dollars more than what the women pay (lots of demand, big supply, less money).  Welcome to the economics chapter of endurance riding.

Plus, for some reason, my tights don't seem to last near as long as those belonging to my wife or daughter.  This could be a pure physics thing, along the lines of E = MC squared, with M, being Mass, meaning weight, meaning my fat belly.  But, personally, I think it has to do with getting low priority when it comes to horse attire for male riders. In other words, we get the scraps of material left when they make our tights, after all the women are taken care of.

I've tried figuring out what size I would be in the female world, to get that lower price and better quality of tights.  But then there's that habit I have of going to the bathroom (number one) and I have yet to find a female pair that has a zipper where one belongs.  I refuse to pull my tights down and squat, even if I end up wearing female tights.  But like I said, after three years in endurance, I have little pride left, so that day may soon come.

So, Tim, forget the jeans, forget your pride, and just suck it in and buy a pair.  State Line tack sells them for about 55 dollars.  And, trust me, no matter how tall you are, get the longs.  If a short guy like me needs longs, I'm sure you will also.  And if you want to compete with the best dressed set in the endurance world, make sure you contact Truman.

 

cya,

Howard (still in mourning due to my Gators not being the SEC Champions, as they should be, this year)