The truth about the letters in the dressage arena

["Karen J. Zelinsky" <kjz2@juno.com>]

Thought you guys could make this ridecamp-friendly in wording!
Karen in PA

*************************

>>The Dressage Arena
>>
>>In a numbered order befitting the topic, are the Top Ten Reasons Why
>>Dressage Arenas Are Lettered The Way They Are:
>>
>>#10: The letters commemorate the sites of legendary falls by
18th-century
>>dressage masters: Karl somebody-or-other's stallion launched him into
orbit
>>from the end of one of the long sides, Conrad bought it in the middle
of
>the
>>far end, Xavier's horse got the urge to lie down and roll right in the
>>center of the arena, etcetera.
>>
>>#7: The letters *are* consecutive and in alphabetical order, in a
>>now-extinct language spoken only by early-18th-century Hanoverian
carriage
>>horses.
>>
>>#9: Hey, after riding five hundred 20m circles in rapid succession, who
can
>>remember the alphabet?
>>
>>#5:The very first dressage ring was designed by the lowest-bid
contractor.
>>
>>#26:The letters were originally laid out by beleaguered riding pupils
to
>>facilitate pranks on their instructors, in which the pupils would
pretend
>to
>>be schooling various movements and figures while actually spelling out
>>slanderous curses, in German, against their cruel and heartless
>instructors,
>>their diabolical horses, and whatever silly bastard invented this
dressage
>>thing in the first place.
>>
>>#4: The letters are actually advertising billboards paid for by Sesame
>>Street ("This piaffe-passage transition was brought to you by the
letter
>>G!").
>>
>>#9: What, you mean they're NOT in alphabetical order? Hey, that would
>>explain why nobody else seems to understand how I've organized the
office
>>files...
>>
>>#2: The other letters in the alphabet are *there*, all right, they're
just
>>invisible - what do you think your horse has been spooking at all these
>>years?
>>
>>#17 Well, the letters are *supposed* to be in alphabetical order, but
>>somebody's Trakehner keeps getting out at night and rearranging them.
And
>>now...(drum roll please)... the #1 Reason Why Dressage Arenas Are
Marked
>>That Way ...
>>
>>#1: So they can double as landing strips for the invasion force from
Planet
>>Lippinzinger. (The Lipp spaceship is round and white, and can go from
Speed
>>of Light to full halt in just 120 meters. Though sometimes it finishes
with
>>its haunches a little out to the left).
>>

--------- End forwarded message ----------

________________________________________________________________
YOU'RE PAYING TOO MUCH FOR THE INTERNET!
Juno now offers FREE Internet Access!
Try it today - there's no risk!  For your FREE software, visit:
http://dl.www.juno.com/get/tagj.