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Fwd: The horse lovers lament



 

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In a message dated 9/27/00 7:25:26 PM Pacific Daylight Time, 
lordfarm@pacbell.net writes:


> > THE HORSE LOVER`S LAMENT
> > 
> > by Bill Fortner
> > 
> > (Sung to the tune of "Rawhide")
> > 
> > Ridin`, ridin`, ridin,
> > Oh, how I do love ridin`
> > Can`t get enough horse ridin`
> > RAWHIDE
> > 
> > In any kind of weather,
> > My ass is cravin` leather,
> > I can not wait until I get to ride!
> > It`s ALWAYS such a pleasure;
> > A joy I can not measure.
> > It does such wondrus things to me inside!
> > Moanin`, moanin`, moanin`
> > Yes my ass is swollen
> > In just 3 miles I`m groanin`
> > RAWHIDE
> > 
> > This buck, crowhop, and flutter
> > Has turned my legs to butter
> > I`m wishing that I had already died.
> > All the things I`m missin`
> > My soap op`ras and dishes
> > Like a dream are passin` by my eyes.
> > Runnin`, jumpin`, leapin`
> > Yes my eyes are weepin`
> > I wish I were home sleepin`
> > RAWHIDE
> > 
> > Blazin` way past lopin`
> > My lycra jeans are smokin`
> > Amazing! Since I think they`re soaked in brine.
> > My heart is palpatatin`
> > My liver`s dislocatin`
> > My God! I just got strangled by a vine.
> > Bitchin`, bitchin`, bitchin`
> > Now my crotch is itchin`
> > I could be home a stitchin`
> > RAWHIDE
> > 
> > Horse did a "Snowy River"
> > MID AIR! My heart`s a quiver
> > Damn fool thinks that he`s an aeroplane!
> > Though I am still a sailin`
> > My altitude is failin`
> > I think this horse is totally insane!
> > Prayin`, prayin`, prayin`
> > It`s too late for sayin`
> > I wish I was home playin`
> > RAWHIDE
> > 
> > My raspy throat`s a thirstin`
> > My drawers are filled to burstin`
> > Head to toe I know I`m black and blue.
> > This horse is nine tenths devil,
> > I`ll say this on the level,
> > If I survive I`m thinking barbecue!
> > Cussin`, cussin`, cussin`,
> > I`m eloquently cussin`,
> > I need NEW words for cussin`,
> > RAWHIDE
> > 
> > There`s one thing I`m a hatin`
> > There`ll be no procreatin`
> > I just landed on the saddle horn!
> > The pain`s excrutiatin`
> > No ambulance a waitin`
> > I curse the day that I was ever born.
> > Whinin`, whinin`, whinin`
> > My poor heart is pinin`
> > I could have been out dinin`
> > RAWHIDE
> > 
> > Hell bent through briar and thicket,
> > O`er barbed wire, post, and picket,
> > I`m clinging for dear life as on we fly.
> > If I can find the stable,
> > And get off if I`m able,
> > I`ll never ride again and that`s no lie!
> > Seein`, seein`, seein`,
> > I can`t believe I`m seein`
> > Yes my eyes are seein`
> > THE BARN
> > Around the bend I see it!
> > Too fast to stop! Oh sheyut!
> > I`m in the air again ... this time alone!
> > A triple flip `fore landin`,
> > Then on my feet a standin`.
> > A SUPER RIDE it was now that I`m home!!!
> > 
> > Chorus:
> > Horse broke wind! What a stink!
> > Oh my back! Broke I think!
> > Broke a nail! Need a drink!
> > RAWHIDE
> > 
> > Lost a spur, banged my knee,
> > Bumped my head ... on a tree,
> > Mercy sakes! Woe is me!
> > RAWHIDE
> >



---- Begin included message ----
This was sent to me. I thought it very funny and decided to pass it on.

Gayle


> 
> -----
> 
> THE HORSE LOVER`S LAMENT
> 
> by Bill Fortner
> 
> (Sung to the tune of "Rawhide")
> 
> Ridin`, ridin`, ridin,
> Oh, how I do love ridin`
> Can`t get enough horse ridin`
> RAWHIDE
> 
> In any kind of weather,
> My ass is cravin` leather,
> I can not wait until I get to ride!
> It`s ALWAYS such a pleasure;
> A joy I can not measure.
> It does such wondrus things to me inside!
> Moanin`, moanin`, moanin`
> Yes my ass is swollen
> In just 3 miles I`m groanin`
> RAWHIDE
> 
> This buck, crowhop, and flutter
> Has turned my legs to butter
> I`m wishing that I had already died.
> All the things I`m missin`
> My soap op`ras and dishes
> Like a dream are passin` by my eyes.
> Runnin`, jumpin`, leapin`
> Yes my eyes are weepin`
> I wish I were home sleepin`
> RAWHIDE
> 
> Blazin` way past lopin`
> My lycra jeans are smokin`
> Amazing! Since I think they`re soaked in brine.
> My heart is palpatatin`
> My liver`s dislocatin`
> My God! I just got strangled by a vine.
> Bitchin`, bitchin`, bitchin`
> Now my crotch is itchin`
> I could be home a stitchin`
> RAWHIDE
> 
> Horse did a "Snowy River"
> MID AIR! My heart`s a quiver
> Damn fool thinks that he`s an aeroplane!
> Though I am still a sailin`
> My altitude is failin`
> I think this horse is totally insane!
> Prayin`, prayin`, prayin`
> It`s too late for sayin`
> I wish I was home playin`
> RAWHIDE
> 
> My raspy throat`s a thirstin`
> My drawers are filled to burstin`
> Head to toe I know I`m black and blue.
> This horse is nine tenths devil,
> I`ll say this on the level,
> If I survive I`m thinking barbecue!
> Cussin`, cussin`, cussin`,
> I`m eloquently cussin`,
> I need NEW words for cussin`,
> RAWHIDE
> 
> There`s one thing I`m a hatin`
> There`ll be no procreatin`
> I just landed on the saddle horn!
> The pain`s excrutiatin`
> No ambulance a waitin`
> I curse the day that I was ever born.
> Whinin`, whinin`, whinin`
> My poor heart is pinin`
> I could have been out dinin`
> RAWHIDE
> 
> Hell bent through briar and thicket,
> O`er barbed wire, post, and picket,
> I`m clinging for dear life as on we fly.
> If I can find the stable,
> And get off if I`m able,
> I`ll never ride again and that`s no lie!
> Seein`, seein`, seein`,
> I can`t believe I`m seein`
> Yes my eyes are seein`
> THE BARN
> Around the bend I see it!
> Too fast to stop! Oh sheyut!
> I`m in the air again ... this time alone!
> A triple flip `fore landin`,
> Then on my feet a standin`.
> A SUPER RIDE it was now that I`m home!!!
> 
> Chorus:
> Horse broke wind! What a stink!
> Oh my back! Broke I think!
> Broke a nail! Need a drink!
> RAWHIDE
> 
> Lost a spur, banged my knee,
> Bumped my head ... on a tree,
> Mercy sakes! Woe is me!
> RAWHIDE
>

---- Begin included message ----
Hi Gayle,

Yes, your check definitely went out.  It was sent Priority Mail, which they
said is 2-3 days (not counting the day you send it).

I wasn't gone to a show...it was the IALHA Board of Directors meeting.   I
don't know how this keeps happening, every time I turn around, I am on a new
committee.  So between the Board of Directors, the National Show Committee,
the S/P Committee, the PRE committee, the magazine, the newsletter, and the
website (hmmm, am I forgetting anything?), and all of the little
sub-committees that seem to be entertwined with all of those things, they
manage to keep me working 24/7 these days.

I got a little laugh today.....thought you'd enjoy it.

Nia

-----

THE HORSE LOVER`S LAMENT

by Bill Fortner

(Sung to the tune of "Rawhide")

Ridin`, ridin`, ridin,
Oh, how I do love ridin`
Can`t get enough horse ridin`
RAWHIDE

In any kind of weather,
My ass is cravin` leather,
I can not wait until I get to ride!
It`s ALWAYS such a pleasure;
A joy I can not measure.
It does such wondrus things to me inside!
Moanin`, moanin`, moanin`
Yes my ass is swollen
In just 3 miles I`m groanin`
RAWHIDE

This buck, crowhop, and flutter
Has turned my legs to butter
I`m wishing that I had already died.
All the things I`m missin`
My soap op`ras and dishes
Like a dream are passin` by my eyes.
Runnin`, jumpin`, leapin`
Yes my eyes are weepin`
I wish I were home sleepin`
RAWHIDE

Blazin` way past lopin`
My lycra jeans are smokin`
Amazing! Since I think they`re soaked in brine.
My heart is palpatatin`
My liver`s dislocatin`
My God! I just got strangled by a vine.
Bitchin`, bitchin`, bitchin`
Now my crotch is itchin`
I could be home a stitchin`
RAWHIDE

Horse did a "Snowy River"
MID AIR! My heart`s a quiver
Damn fool thinks that he`s an aeroplane!
Though I am still a sailin`
My altitude is failin`
I think this horse is totally insane!
Prayin`, prayin`, prayin`
It`s too late for sayin`
I wish I was home playin`
RAWHIDE

My raspy throat`s a thirstin`
My drawers are filled to burstin`
Head to toe I know I`m black and blue.
This horse is nine tenths devil,
I`ll say this on the level,
If I survive I`m thinking barbecue!
Cussin`, cussin`, cussin`,
I`m eloquently cussin`,
I need NEW words for cussin`,
RAWHIDE

There`s one thing I`m a hatin`
There`ll be no procreatin`
I just landed on the saddle horn!
The pain`s excrutiatin`
No ambulance a waitin`
I curse the day that I was ever born.
Whinin`, whinin`, whinin`
My poor heart is pinin`
I could have been out dinin`
RAWHIDE

Hell bent through briar and thicket,
O`er barbed wire, post, and picket,
I`m clinging for dear life as on we fly.
If I can find the stable,
And get off if I`m able,
I`ll never ride again and that`s no lie!
Seein`, seein`, seein`,
I can`t believe I`m seein`
Yes my eyes are seein`
THE BARN
Around the bend I see it!
Too fast to stop! Oh sheyut!
I`m in the air again ... this time alone!
A triple flip `fore landin`,
Then on my feet a standin`.
A SUPER RIDE it was now that I`m home!!!

Chorus:
Horse broke wind! What a stink!
Oh my back! Broke I think!
Broke a nail! Need a drink!
RAWHIDE

Lost a spur, banged my knee,
Bumped my head ... on a tree,
Mercy sakes! Woe is me!
RAWHIDE

-- 
Nia Ridley
Miraval Andalusians - Home of Don Marco
http://www.miravalandalusians.com

> From: "lordfarm@pacbell.net" <lordfarm@pacbell.net>
> Organization: Pacific Bell Internet Services
> Reply-To: lordfarm@pacbell.net
> Date: Mon, 25 Sep 2000 21:31:26 -0700
> To: Nia Ridley <nridley@miravalandalusians.com>
> Subject: Re: Hi
> 
> Hi Nia,
> 
> Thanks, I appreciate that. I hope you had a nice trip. Was it a horse show?
> 
> Anyway, I did email the stories to you. I didn't think to actually mail
> them. That's a lot of postage.
> 
> I'm sorry this is so broken up. I'm developing a migrain but I wanted to
> right to you.
> 
> I hope all is well with you,
> Gayle
> 
> Nia Ridley wrote:
>> 
>> Hi Gayle,
>> 
>> I have been out of town since last week.....sorry....just got your mails.  I
>> didn't have your address with me, and couldnt' catch up with my roommate to
>> have her look it up here.   Your check will go out first thing tomorrow
>> (Monday).  I'll make sure it goes Priority Mail.
>> 
>> More later.  I am wading through 168 emails.  And to answer your other
>> question....no, I didn't get your stories.  I was looking for them in the
>> REAL mail, so I'll go back and make sure they werent' attached to your
>> email, but I am pretty sure I checked already.
>> 
>> More later,
>> 
>> Nia
>> --
>> Nia Ridley
>> Miraval Andalusians - Home of Don Marco
>> http://www.miravalandalusians.com
>> 
>>> From: "lordfarm@pacbell.net" <lordfarm@pacbell.net>
>>> Organization: Pacific Bell Internet Services
>>> Reply-To: lordfarm@pacbell.net
>>> Date: Sat, 23 Sep 2000 13:24:34 -0700
>>> To: Nia Ridley <nridley@miravalandalusians.com>
>>> Subject: Hi
>>> 
>>> Hi Nia,
>>> 
>>> I hate to bother you, buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut... Have you sent my check out
>>> yet? I guess I'm really stressed because I had to float a check to make
>>> sure one of my bill is not late.
>>> 
>>> 
>>> 
>>> Gayle
>>> 
>>> PS- I hope everyting is okay up there????????? I haven't heard from you
>>> in awhile.
>>> 
> 

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