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RULES OF THE AIR
1. Every takeoff is optional. Every landing is mandatory.
2. If you push the stick forward, the
houses get bigger. If you pull
the stick back, they get smaller. That is, unless you keep
pulling
the stick all
the way back, then they get bigger again.
3. Flying isn't dangerous. Crashing is what's dangerous.
4. It's always better to be down here
wishing you were up there than
up there wishing you were down here.
5. The ONLY time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.
6. The propeller is just a big fan in
front of the plane used to
keep the pilot cool. When it stops, you can actually watch the
pilot
start
sweating.
7. When in doubt, hold on to your
altitude. No one has ever collided
with the sky.
8. A 'good' landing is one from which
you can walk away. A 'great'
landing is one after which they can use the plane again.
9. Learn from the mistakes of others.
You won't live long enough to
make all of them yourself.
10. You know you've landed with the
wheels up if it takes full power
to taxi to the ramp.
11. The probability of survival is
inversely proportional to the
angle of arrival. Large angle of arrival, small probability
of
survival and vice
versa.
12. Never let an aircraft take you
somewhere your brain didn't get
to five minutes earlier.
13. Stay out of clouds. The silver
lining everyone keeps talking
about might be another airplane going in the opposite
direction.
Reliable
sources also report that mountains have been known to hide
out in clouds.
14. Always try to keep the number of
landings you make equal to the
number of take offs you've made.
15. There are three simple rules for
making a smooth landing.
Unfortunately no one knows what they are.
16. You start with a bag full of luck
and an empty bag of
experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before
you
empty the bag of
luck.
17. Helicopters can't fly; they're
just so ugly the earth repels
them.
18. If all you can see out of the
window is ground that's going
round and round and all you can hear is commotion coming from
the
passenger
compartment, things are not at all as they should be.
19. In the ongoing battle between
objects made of aluminum going
hundreds of miles per hour and the ground going zero miles per
hour,
the ground has
yet to lose.
20. Good judgment comes from
experience. Unfortunately, the
experience usually comes from bad judgment.
21. It's always a good idea to keep
the pointy end going forward as
much as possible.
22. Keep looking around. There's always something you've missed.
23. Remember, gravity is not just a
good idea. It's the law. And
it's not subject to repeal.
24. The three most useless things to a
pilot are the altitude above
you, runway behind you, and a tenth of a second ago.
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